A woman with the potential to make it big. It is not that she cannot: she simply will not.
The closest anyone has come to being an adopted daughter.

Sunday, January 24, 2010


I wonder how many hitch-hikers shall have a toothbrush as the number two option on their priority list while packing. I don't think many would.

Toothbrushes are not essential components of survival. You can ideally go without them for ages; we're not discussing towels here, or somewhat less importantly, oxygen, water or food. There is the hygiene issue, but I suppose if you're really stranded in some deserted place, you can do without dental care for a few days.

However, we're ignoring something over here: our minds.

Something doesn't really click when you pass away when the clock strikes noon, and your teeth haven't encountered that weird bushy feel throughout the morning. Add to the fact that they haven't faced the feeling the previous week either. Now, as day fades into night, you suddenly crave for that feeling. You suddenly realise that you cannot live without it any longer. There's this inexplicable feeling all over your insides which you can't explain, and you suddenly crave for it. You turn irrational, you shout at random people, you put up bizarre outbursts, and you cannot find a reason for all that.

And then, suddenly the feeling begins to strangle you, but you feel more helpless than ever and shout and groan and writhe and shout in agony and bang your head against the wall and feel like you're going insane and try to cling on to whatever you can and you become a nobody and nonentity and a pathetic helpless worm and...

... and then, it suddenly hits you that the supply wagon has still a month to arrive. Or maybe a year. Or a millennium.


  1. Why is it not called teethbrush,since teeth is plural?
    What is the colour of your present toothbrush and what's your favourite colour?

    1. I have no idea why it is not called a teethbrush.

      And as for personal questions, you need to email me.

  2. Will you not recognize me if i were to mail you?
    Okay, if you say so,I will not ask personal questions from now on.
    I'm a former classmate of yours and was only too happy to discover your blog.

    1. You somehow do not sound like any classmate I had, but since you insist, I have to believe you - as you would get nothing out of lying to me.

  3. Why i sound like none of your classmates?
    And no,this is not a brain-teaser.

    1. I remember how my classmates used to speak like. All of them. Not a single guy I remember spoke like the way you do.

    2. I know,i know,you have an elephantine memory!
      You hardly live in the present and have pursed the past.That when in the past you were too shy and too self conscious...had(still have?) poor self worth and expected the worst.
      And If i have not stressed enough already-I am a woman.
      *Sigh*but that does not matter.
      Since i want answers; will you at least agree to a tag post?

    3. Ah, there are so many Anonymous commenters on my blog that I cannot really fathom who is who.

      True, I prefer living in the past, and if you're indeed speaking the truth, then you have changed substantially over time.

      What is a tag post, by the way?

    4. Let me tell you something.Of the lot,you were slightly aloof,reticent and always very well mannered.
      Sometimes when your sensitive skin got too tight,you had us in splits with an odd joke.
      I always thought the teachers were partial towards you,but no,you were really sensible.
      Now you are a prisoner of the past.
      Why i ask?

    5. Thank you for the nice words. They really mean a lot to me.

      True, I live in the past a lot. This is probably due to the fact that my school, college, and university days were the best of my life, and the rest of my life really don't stand a chance in front of them.

      I really long for a single opportunity to re-live one day - just one day - from my student days. Since that is ruled out, I typically stick to the next best thing available - living a lot of my life in the past.

      Now, what is a tag post?

    6. 1) Have you ever thought that by hanging onto the past so dearly,you're poking a scab that wants to heal itself? (yeah yeah,laugh at the poetic trope)
      2) I've seen this trait is very particular to you: Are your jokes often a sort of conscious defence mechanism? Unlike others,do you tend to joke a lot when very shyor nervous?
      3) you want to relive school or uni days?specifically,what day would that be? One that you wish to relive.

      A tag post is like a slam book having a list of questions.Questions usually relate to more silly aspects of life..high school variety of questions that revolve around saddest day,foods one liked,fears etc..much like your 'my life in numbers' post.

    7. 1. No, I have not thought of it that way. I do not have many scabs from the past, though. Do note the word 'many' here, BTW.
      2. No, I try to joke always, irrespective of the situation.
      3. Not a day in general. The entire era.

      Have you been reading everything on my blog?

  4. Huh? didn't get your question.Define 'everything'.
    Also,do you like dancing?

    1. Virtually everything, even my obscure early posts, judging by your comments.

      I do not like dancing. I thought all my classmates were aware of the fact.

  5. i recently discovered your blog and read as much as i could.
    I'll be waiting before you decide to post something.
    Why were you so shy during your student days? Are you still shy as you used to be?
    Do you still like doodling?
    And my, how much your daughter resembles you!
    She completely takes after you!
    your xerox !

    1. I had no idea that I was shy, and I have remained the same.

      And yes, I still like doodling.

      PS: Xerox is a brand name. The word you want to use is 'photocopy'.

    2. Aha,and you sir,see yourself as "intelectually challenged"?
      thanks for clearing that up.I always thought them as synonymns.
      So, Up for a tag post?

    3. The synonym bit was nice. :)

      But, as far as a tag post is concerned, we will communicate on that only through email.

  6. Replies
    1. Just curious, why are you so reluctant to drop me an email?

  7. Seriously,that question is such a duh!
    Why do you think i have been posting as anon all this while?
    I know you are one busy man and i should not bother you with silly personal questions,but can you,can you post more often?
    i like knowing tidbits about your life.
    You may laugh,but I REALLY admire you.

    1. I am really laughing. I cannot remember any classmate of mine who REALLY admired me. :)

      I will post more often. It's less about time and more about lack of ideas, actually.

    2. Okay okay.let's rest it at that.Your blog's getting sullied.
      Besides,too much praise can make one egoistic.
      But in your busy life,whenever you feel chips are down,or feel overburdened,or when you feel like killing yourself(horror,horror)...
      Remember that you are a much loved creature.

    3. Let your face be smeared with flowers and sandalwood, if you know what I mean. :)

  8. Hmm...that is 'also' the ritual for the dead :)

    1. It seems you find praise too burdensome and wish to promptly repay its imaginary 'gratitude' .I'd rather be silent then.

    2. That is entirely up to you - the silence bit, that is. I am not a convoluted person, so please try to take my words at their face values.